ultrafacts:

The name of the judge was Deborah Servitto, and this is the actual court ruling.

Mr. Bailey complains that his rep is trash

So he’s seeking compensation in the form of cash.

Bailey thinks he’s entitled to some monetary gain

Because Eminem used his name in vain.

Eminem says Bailey used to throw him around

Beat him up in the john, shoved his face in the ground.

Eminem contends that his rap is protected

By the rights guaranteed by the First Amendment.

Eminem maintains that the story is true

And that Bailey beat him black and blue.

In the alternative he states that the story is phony

And a reasonable person would think it’s baloney.

The court must always balance the rights

Of a defendant and one placed in a false light.

If the plaintiff presents no question of fact

To dismiss is the only acceptable act.

If the language used is anything but pleasin’

It must be highly objectionable to a person of reason.

Even if objectionable and causing offense

Self-help is the first line of defense.

Yet when Bailey actually spoke to the press

What do you think he didn’t address?

Those false-light charges that so disturbed

Prompted from Bailey not a single word.

So highly objectionable, it could not be

Bailey was happy to hear his name on a CD.

Bailey also admitted he was a bully in youth

Which makes what Marshall said substantial truth.

This doctrine is a defense well known

And renders Bailey’s case substantially blown.

The lyrics are stories no one would take as fact

They’re an exaggeration of a childish act.

Any reasonable person could clearly see

That the lyrics could only be hyperbole.

It is therefore this court’s ultimate position

That Eminem is entitled to summary disposition.

Source

Follow Ultrafacts for more facts!

(via thedegenerategamblers)

laughter-everyday:

unamusedsloth:

NYPD escorting a raccoon out of a beauty salon

"GROOT HELP ME YOU FUCKING TWIG"

(Source: unamusedsloth, via agentrodgers)

fernaon:

rampant-noodle:

koncreates:

turntechgoddamnit:

He be sayin Hi all the time like he just got there when you know his little ass just zoned out and forgot.

I still don’t give a shit if i’ve rebloged this before.  i still love it.

i have to reblog every time because 

image

this is perfect like omfg

(via hitchikers-guide-to-the-bible)

tehrisa:

someone take my computer away.

why is this meme real? why did i succumb to this?

(via milesjai)

autumncozy:

Cats in scarves in the fall.

(Source: 500px.com, via stealthydice)

stability:

the-illuminator-neuromancer:

stability:

i dont want to go back to school i want to travel the world and watch more shows on netflix

But you can’t watch Netflix outside the US

yet here i am, watching bobs burgers in australia, living my dream

image

(via stealthydice)

    skype calls

  • : what
  • : what
  • : huh
  • : what
  • : you froze
  • : ok you're good
  • : no i couldn't hear you
  • : you were breaking up
  • : what

pansysky:

spookytox:

reaill:

grimfemme:

I just wanted to eat breakfast ;(

welp now we know the distinction between the two

Have….have people…not eaten shredded wheat before? The regular sized ones?

You put it in a bowl and pour milk on it (with sugar + cinnamon if you’re not some lunatic fiber satan who just wants to eat wheat strings) and let it soak a bit before breaking it up and eating bite sized portions with your spoon.

DO PEOPLE NOT KNOW THIS?!

NONE OF US KNEW THAT

(via priincess-sylveon)

youcouldbefound:

neoliberalismkills:

"no one can love you until you love yourself"

that is complete bullshit

don’t let anyone tell you that you don’t deserve love from other people because you struggle with loving yourself

this everyone read this right now

(Source: neoliberalismkills, via heycoolkidisthisyou)